So this video popped up on my feed yesterday. I try to avoid watching anything that will distract me too much but Toy Galaxy's videos are usually pretty good. Their digression into more serious fair, however, has been a step above. I was a curious and it did not disappoint.
The long and short of it is that what we love can become something that costs more than we can bear. Addiction isn't inaccurate but it isn't the right word either.
I am suffering from a worsening shoulder injury that the prevelent theory is a labrum tear
. I don't know eactly when this injury happened but I am not without a multitude of possibilities.
The likeliest culprit (this year) has been a recent effort to 'master' the Czar of the Bodyweight Lifts, the One-Arm-One-Leg Push-Up. As progress stalled, while pain mounted, this diagnosis sent me into a spin.
I've been accumulating 'lifts' since embracing gymnastics. Not content to achieve the Sinister Goal (100 one-handed swings with a 48kg kettlebell, followed by 5 get-ups on each side with the same bell, all in 16 minutes), I've been doing gymnastics training (begun September before last after I injured my hip at my blue belt test). Things like the Hanging Leg Lift, Stand-to-Stand Bridge, Reverse Leg Lift, Windshield Wipers, Pistols, and Hamstring Raises, are all feats of gymnastic strength that I've achieved.
I'm knocking on the door of a free handstand, I can do a tuck-planche for reps, my front and back levers are both coming along.
The long list of lifts keeps inching its way up. And thus this video registered with me. Is this fun? Do I enjoy this? We're beyond 'do I need it'. I'm easily the strongest person at my kung fu school. Even the pro fighter I help train for weapons tournaments remarks in awe of my strength. So why am I still so determined to master every last skill and maintain it endlessly?
I have to cut back, and yet the thought is unsettling.
And all the while, my shoulder aches on.